I am a father of a wonderful 9 year old who is the center of my life. I have been a great father, giving him a good start in life. Our relationship is as close as it gets and I have been a primary caregiver all of his life.

It is unfortunate that his mother and I, like many, divorced when he was 3 after 7 years of marriage. I would have preferred he grow up in an intact family. Having prevailed in a custody battle, we now share the parenting responsibilities equally per my preference. He is blessed to have both of his parents fully involved.

My Child's Life

Today, my soon to be 4th grade marvel is active in Sunday school, baseball, soccer, basketball, and cub scouts. In fact he just stepped up to Webelos for all of you scouts. He is a very good boy with a great heart for other people. I am so proud of him. He is truly on the right track and I love being his DAD. He really loves going places with his friends. All of these activities are centered in our neighborhood, a pleasant middle class, family oriented suburb where we have owned our home for many years. While I am the prime facilitator for all of these activities in his life, his mother is also involved where she can be so my son, even with the divorce, enjoys the benefits of both his mother and father. Other than the divorce, my son's world seems pretty ideal to many, right? Today I suppose that would be a true statement.

What I have Accomplished Since

Other than the divorce, life has been workable for these last 15 years since I put the past behind me. I sweated through college, got a respectable degree, married, had a child and have been a proud and involved father on a daily basis of these last 10 years. I am a wonderful contributor to my community and have positively impacted many lives.

Black Cloud and the Feeding Frenzy

My only black cloud to mitigate my happiness has been the registration requirement subsequent to a questionable conviction, my first and only. In 1989, it was a private thing and life could be managed. With the technology, growth of the Internet and cable TV, our public suddenly became deluged with truly hideous events that make every parent want to cry, including folks like me. Now events in distant places that used to be somebody else's local news were everyday news for the nation. Suddenly, a handful of horrible events across a large nation appeared to be commonplace in everybody's back yard. This is not to mitigate the awful nature of these tragedies, just to put feeding frenzy into perspective. Three summers ago, it suddenly seemed that our nations beaches were filled with one shark attack after another like the sharks had a meeting and coordinated their attack on the humans. The reality of it was that shark attacks were less than average that year. The difference was sensationalized attention by the national media.

The effect of saturating the public with the ugliness, one horrific event at a time, was to instill a perception of a new and dangerous phenomenon to be fearful of. This gained viewers attention for the news programs. Fear and hatred have been instilled in the average citizen, looking for remedy to these awful events. Well intended advocates of victims began lashing out almost aimlessly with a shotgun scatter, leading the charge of hatred to the perceived perpetrators, an entire population of people known as the S*x Offenders. Regardless of their intensity of their crime, they have to pay the price for the high profile crimes committed by others across the nation. They have to pay the price for crimes they never committed and will never commit.

Having said that, my heart bleeds for the suffering incurred by the victims of these offenses. My prayers follow you and I don't want to minimize your tragic loss. I know there are extreme perpetrators that need to spend the rest of their natural lives behind bars for the pain they have caused. The guy that urinated on the sidewalk or made a one-time mistake on a lesser level however should not be punished for the horrific crime of another person. He or she should be punished only for the severity of his or her crime. Not all punishments should be equal. He should not be punished for potential crimes in the future that have never been committed either unless a clear pattern has been demonstrated. 96.5% of people that have been convicted of a sexually related offense do not repeat a sexually related offense.

Why My Life has Been Normal (relatively)

The only reason my life has been workable and livable for these 15 years is because no body needed to know. I could be looked at by "every day people" for the person that I am and the respect I earn with him or her through how I currently live life. In some ways, though even having to register was a heavy burden on my heart, a deeply kept secret because many would misunderstand, my life has offered hope. I have been able to have a family, raise a child, get and education, and have a good career. I worked very hard to do everything right, living a very respectable life. I am held in high esteem in my community, friends and family. I have built and earned a shining reputation. I have been on a good path to a repaired life as a father raising a wonderful son.

Misconceptions

When the evening news plays, or the papers report these events that makes everyone's hearts race with fear and hatred, the very word Convicted S*x Offender instills a stereotype. Yes, what races in everyone's mind is this sick person hiding in the bushes to pounce on and sexually abuse his next victim. Their first thought: Why isn't he locked up for good to keep us all safe? Why did they ever let that person out to begin with? Clearly our society is plagued with some of these animals. It is a tough dilemma. We are all concerned. However, to angrily lash out at so many people who are not animals and never were, just in hopes that you might snare a small percentage who are, is grossly unfair to the majority of people classified this way along with their families. Statistics prove MOST (96.5%) are not going to re-offend. So many made a bad mistake, paid the price, and are trying to make things right but their hopes and dreams to move ahead and live a good life are shattered by a mushrooming punishment, like a "ball and chain" that continues to grow.

Former Offender Population is Diverse

Shock is the standard reaction of people I have told of my plight. They are usually shocked at the reality of the breadth of who is classified as a S*x Offender. The general public has the belief that you must be really bad to be classified that way. If you have been made to register, it is because you must be dangerous or it would not be required. Most people are unfamiliar with the laws and how they work and assume that the state would not err. The legislature has taken any discretion out of the judge's hands. Ironically, it is the judge, not the legislature that understands the severity of the specific offense, the facts of the case, and could better balance the outcome. They don't realize that many non-dangerous and non-repetitive offenses end up being grouped along with the worst. Urinating in public, public nudity, consensual relations between two people where one was barely short of being of the age of consent, are a few crimes that while should be crimes perhaps, should not be dealt with by stigmatizing the person for life by lumping them in with the worst in our society. People make mistakes. Punish them according to the degree of the negative affects of their crime to teach them a lesson, then give them a chance to do better and get past it. Maybe an eye for an eye would be balanced. Currently it is a life for an eye. A person that stumbles upon an illegal pornographic image in some cases is punished more than a violent criminal or murderer. Even if he survives prison, this person will be punished for life. The violent and dangerous criminal (non sexual), once released from prison has a chance at a fresh start.

Not many realize that these non-repeat offenders (some cleared or even wrongfully convicted) are required to undergo the life long punishment of public humiliation, chastisement, vigilantism, discrimination, and many other punitive disabilities. Malicious, violent criminals have gotten off lighter than the 19 year old kid that has s*x with his 17 year old girlfriend. This 19 year old once he is freed from jail or probation cannot set his life straight. He will be unemployable for the rest of his life except for menial jobs that don't do background checks. Respectable companies won't hire former S*x Offenders. Most apartments won't rent to one either resulting in clustering or homelessness. This person for a mistake he made, will be punished the rest of his life. He will be judged and misjudged daily by those around him as he goes through his life. Most people will not be told how long ago his crime was, or even the details that might take their hate and fear away. They will only know that he is a S*x Offender, a person to be despised and spat upon by all decent, law abiding citizens. Nobody will have more doors slammed in their face, or encounter more mean stares, or suffer the brunt end of more negative acts than this person who made one big mistake so many years ago. Have you ever made a mistake? We all have but we move on and try to do better.

New retroactive Laws Attached to Megan's Law

Upon the passing of Megan's Laws in Arizona, a slew of frightening "piggyback" legislation has arisen from the absurd level of fear that has been nurtured through the media. This has mobilized legislators to beat their chest, competing with one another for the public vote. It is pretty clear that who ever is the toughest on these feared, wicked, and hideous monsters, wins regardless of the collateral damage to the innocent families. The mood that inspired these laws is emotional and irrational. This hatred is feeding on itself. We as a nation are on a slippery slope of denying basic rights to a select group of people. Many of these people who have paid their price long ago are now assessed with new penalties and disabilities, depriving them of a normal pursuit of life and happiness. These penalties are retroactively applied and are mushrooming in intensity. It is the "Amazing Expanding Punishment" with no end in site like a runaway train gaining speed. Regardless of the magnitude of the crime, the punishment is almost the same, expanding for a lifetime. The victims of this overwhelming burden are politically powerless, afraid or disabled from speaking out. Who wants to stand up and be named? What lawmaker would stand up for this viewpoint and suffer political death? Therefore their plight, like mine, is rarely shared to the lawmakers and lawmakers are reluctant to listen, consider or act. Even on the occasion that this viewpoint is shared, it is easily dismissed in light of the votes it can gain from a frenzied public. It is easy to counter with "well they should not have done the crime then" or "I have no sympathy for a person that is a S*x Offender". Legislators and Governors rationalize this and can sleep at night knowing that there is always acceptable collateral damage for the "greater good". It is okay to them to sacrifice my son's life because of some hideous event committed by a stranger years ago on the other side of the country. The psychological scars that this could bring to my innocent child are every bit as severe as some victims of crimes. My son was conceived before these new laws.

Many readers might try to dismiss this saying that we have 3 levels of risk for the offender group. Many will say that someone like me perhaps would be a level 0 if it existed. I submit to you that some legislators are continuously proposing that all 3 levels submit to the same notification requirements. This time, the law expanded to encompass level 2 and 3 because the attempt to include level 1 failed. They did capture level 2 now as a mandatory internet posting and neighborhood notification. They also were able to make it retroactive to capture even more. They will keep trying. It is real easy to be classified as a level 2. They automatically classify people at that if they don't have enough data to justify a level 1. I guess that is to err on the side of caution or something. I guess that is to destroy innocent lives due to lack of data just to be on the safe side.

It seems that the underlying intent is to keep piling on new requirements on former offenders. Each new requirement comes with felony consequences if overlooked. Each new requirement under the guise of something good, has another effect. Each new requirement added each new session of congress is a new booby trap, or trip wire, designed to potentially incarcerate as many people as possible. Heaven forbid that someone forgets their drivers' license at home, or fails to pay a huge annual fee on time. The requirements grow every year and many may not even know yet about the new law changes. Ignorance however is no excuse. The underlying intent of this plethora of new restrictions and penalties is to hopefully trip people up into committing new crimes, incarcerate them to remove them from the streets. It is like walking through a minefield. What will the lawmakers dream up next? The ceiling is the limit as they continue to tighten the burdens placed upon these people who are just begging for a second chance and a breath of fresh air.

Punishment versus Regulation

Some say that these laws are not punishment. The Supreme Court of Arizona in State v. Noble and State v. McCuin recognized that registration is punishment in many respects. The ruling was that the punitive effects however were less than the good that can come from the regulatory nature of the laws. At that time in 1991 when they considered this however, registration was more secret and benign. That decision at the time was a close vote. Since then, the disadvantage has dramatically grown and far out weighs the regulation intent. The court back then in State v. Noble, said that "we acknowledge that § 13-3821 has both punitive and regulatory effects." The court went on to conclude however that because the greater good as a law enforcement tool registration serves, the intent of the law at the time, the punitive effects were slight enough to not be considered as a punishment. State v. Noble finding is as follows. "Our decision is close. We nonetheless conclude that, on balance, requiring convicted sex offenders to register pursuant to § 13-3821 is not punishment." Keep in mind that this was before Megan's Law and before all the piggyback legislation that is tacked on yearly like a runaway train.

Imagine

My challenge to anyone who thinks this is not a severe punishment, close your eyes and imagine for a moment. Imagine it were you being wrongfully convicted of a crime then having it set aside years ago in your youth. Everything is alright, right? Well, since this is just regulatory, would you mind registering as a S*x Offender? Don't worry, they tell you, it is just a regulation matter for law enforcement. By the way, can you pay $250.00 a year to the state police department? Maybe next year it will be $1000.00. It is up to the director of the fund to decide. If not, you will be arrested and charged with a felony. Can you please forfeit your lifetime driver's license and renew annually at an additional yearly cost? Oh, and by the way, comb your hair for your license because we will likely be putting your pretty face on the internet for all the world to see. Don't lose your wallet! We will arrest you and charge you. (the list is too long to list them all). What do you mean you were cleared 15 years ago? That doesn't matter because we are not punishing you. Just close your eyes and imagine if this were you having to do this. Is it not a punishment, a life long punishment? It is easy to say, "I don't have to think like that because I would never be in those shoes." That is exactly the way I used to think. People don't realize just how easy it is to slip down this slope.

If I did something so wrong that people would need to be forever warned about me, that I would need expanding punishments as I age, that my child and family must also be punished and potentially my grandchildren, then why didn't the Judge who knows the details and facts of my case throw the book at me and give me a life sentence to protect the public? The legislature instead will punish me instead with never even knowing anything about my situation, after the fact.

I have worked so hard for 15 years to rebuild a respectable life. I struggled through college, graduated with honors, married, had a child, built a respectable life and held in high esteem in my community. My military career was washed down the toilet years ago when I was incorrectly charged. Now another career that I have given blood sweat and tears to build to provide for my family is on the brink of an utter disaster when some of the new laws work there way into being effective.

If this information is ever given to anyone in my life (whoa, flashbacks), my co-workers will be so un-cooperative with me (as it was many years ago in the military), and I will be so despised by some that surely in a few months time, they will find a reason to fire me over something else if not the very fact that I am registered. I did not lie on my application. It was just so far in my past that the background check came up clean. I worked very hard for many years, busted my chops, to get this career that pays a livable and good salary. If I am dismissed, no other similar company will hire me and I will end up with less than half of my salary if I am lucky, in some other lesser job. I will be unable to attain employment in my career field period that I have built my life around. To openly bring this up in a job application process is to forfeit the job opportunity. I know. I've tried many times. I will lose my house for inability to pay the mortgage, and then I cannot rent anywhere because they will not have a perceived monster in their apartment complexes. 15 years ago, the feeding frenzy was not as bad as today. This has happened already to many. It is about to happen to many more.

That would take a few months to happen I am sure. In the meantime and subsequently, my son will surely be exposed to child-based cruelty from peers that are no longer allowed to play with him or walk by his house. Eventually someone will tell him why. He is just a child. He does not need to be made aware of this ugliness. Let him be a child and play baseball and attend school like all the rest of the children. Regardless of the facts, some under-informed neighbors will think the worst and jump to vicious conclusions, in some cases passing misperceptions on to their children. The principal will be skeptical of allowing me to participate in school related activities due to other parental pressure to the contrary regardless of what he thinks. I am the vice president of the PTA. That will go over like a lead balloon. I will be asked to step down and away. My very presence at my son's school will become a nightmare of discomfort for everyone, including my son.

Today, I am seen as a God fearing, church attending, upstanding, contributing, community member with a stellar reputation, let alone an outstanding Dad to my son that I love so dearly. In a short time, our lives could be utterly trashed and there is little hope for the future.

My ex-wife, who I won the custody decision from, will likely take me to court to take my son away to protect him from this chastised life forced upon him by the new laws. The court knew of my circumstances during the custody hearings. The court ruled in my favor then and would most likely rule in my favor again. It would be a hard fight however costing thousands. My family and child are innocent. He should not have to deal with either this humiliation or separation from his father that has raised him all his life. It is not his fault. This punishes my innocent son for a crime I was cleared of many years before he was even born. My son and I deserve the right to live our lives freely and without disabilities or disadvantages imposed by the State of Arizona because of some wicked child killer on the other side of the country.

What did I do so wrong that my family and I must be so disadvantaged in life? I did not rob a bank, kill people, hurt anyone, or take from anyone. I do not have a history of wrongdoing. I have been a law abiding and successful citizen both 25 years before and 15 years after the fact. Doesn't that count for something?

In closing, I was lied to about the age of a girl that presented herself as an adult. She flat-out lied about her age. Have you ever seen a teen look like 22? Have you ever seen a teen pretend to be older to attract somebody older? We all have. I was found innocent of 9 out of 10 trumped up charges in a trial. The jury found me innocent right away but haggled for 3 days over the last charge, a technicality having nothing to do with the intent of the law. 1 juror reversed the vote of the other 11 over those three days of persuading. The judge said this. "There is nothing I can do about that except to state for the record that I think it is a travesty that you are convicted of this offense. I don't think it is right, I don't think it's fair" given the facts. It was not right that I was convicted in this way so the judge a year later set the conviction and all penalties, punishment, accusations and so on, aside. It was set aside. I did not go to jail. The statutes made it mandatory to register because someone in power opined that this is not punishment and therefore the set-aside was irrelevant. Since I had been convicted at one time, the subsequent set aside was not considered a factor. Now I can easily be confused with the worst.

I know sick monsters exist as do their victims. It is heartbreaking and enrages me too. I know that these laws are emotional responses to lessen the risk of the public with respect to these predators. Not everybody classified as a S*x Offender is that repetitive and dangerous monster we all fear. In fact statistics show that only 3.5% repeat their crimes. 96.5% are not repetitive and dangerous offenders that already paid their price for what they did or did not do. The majority will get their lives and their family's lives back on track, harming nobody, if just given a fair second chance without disadvantages and disabilities, penalizing them indefinitely. And yes, believe it or not, some are wrongfully convicted or were badgered into some plea deal for a crime they may not have committed. The prosecution stacked up charges against me totaling well over 200 years of prison time, then tried to get me to plea to single charge for just a a few years in prison. Many innocent people would take that deal given the risk of the rest of their life. I did not. I fought and the truth prevailed. Who would have thought I would someday be writing this?

Our civil rights across this country are all at stake here. It may not be at first obvious by the majority in our country but it is indeed a slippery slope we are on. The incrementalism traversed in forming these laws are truly frightening as a Pandora's Box. The legislature is eating the Elephant one bite at a time so to speak in hopes to incarcerate former offenders someday. We won't know what our country has lost until we have lost it. This is sneaking up on us all. What comes next? What is the next politically powerless group of people who will be next afflicted by this sort of popular hysteria? Each bad law or decision ends up setting up precedence for the next new one that is even further twisted. Just look at how far the laws have changed in the last 10 years or even the last 5 years.

I am not and never have been one of these intense offenders. Although classified as such, I am not and never have been a S*x Offender. Even still today, even though my civil rights were fully restored, I do not have the same rights as the next guy. I live in a bubble where new laws and penalties can be retroactively applied to me any time. It is like living in "Malice in Wonderland". The Constitution does not apply inside the bubble as it does outside the bubble.

Please agree with me. Please try to see this side in balance.

This is wrong. It is against what America traditionally has stood for.

We as a country, need to find a better balance and a better answer to this problem. The system is broken.

If you read this far, I am truly amazed with you. Thanks for taking the time to share my thoughts.

Best Regards,

K